Change

For many of us myself included change comes slow…I realized I needed to change for the better and so I embarked on a journey of change…I pulled blog posts that I felt were attacking others such as my sister with whom I was very angry for many years…I am discovering that by slowing down I can monitor my thought processes more easily and think more before I speak…I have since apologized to those I need to apologize to for my anger…What they do with my apologies is up to them…I cannot control how other’s handle things I say I can only control myself and how I deal with things…This past year I have been working hard on changing from the inside out…The featured image I choose for this blog post was taken a number of years ago by my son who traveled with me when I visited Europe…I traveled Europe on a strict budget and some were amazed that I could do it at all…In 2017 I moved from America to Ireland with my son to give my son a chance to experience life in a different country and to explore Europe…Travel is an education in and of itself and I wanted my son to experience travel as part of his education…We had a nice time but my son was glad and happy to return to America…When I returned to America I choose Texas as a place to settle it is in the deep south and is very hot…I always wanted to live in a warmer climate and my son agreed with me that returning to South Dakota where we lived before for almost ten years was not an option for us…My son grew up in South Dakota I raised him there for almost ten years of his life…During my time in South Dakota I experienced the trauma of false friends and I was not equipped to handle that then…I learned that women I had put on a pedestal were trash talking about me behind my back…As this was being revealed to me I felt deeply hurt and wounded inside…That is because I had yet to heal from my own past traumas…I decided that I did not want to get to know new people after experiencing so many false friends…As time passes this has changed here in Texas I am making new friends and getting to know new people and I am very grateful to be able to do this…My son is also making new friends and getting to know new people…We had a lovely dog but sad to say we had to have her put down due to the fact that she was hit by a car and was not the same afterwards…Before we had her put down we got the opinions of four vets all who had met our dog and knew my family…It was a hard decision to make but for this poor dog it was the right decision…I am grateful to say that today I am in a much better head space than before taking things a day at a time…I still sing sacred scriptures as a hobby and I enjoy doing this…I have completed Matthew, Mark, Luke and John and I am working on the rest of the New Testament…I am staying in the New Testament for now…I have also since found a very nice church that I call home that I attend every Sunday…I am enjoying a couple of Bible Studies and volunteering with my church at the City Mission has truly opened my eyes to how blessed I truly am…How blessed many of us are when we are not homeless…There is much to be grateful for…I dedicated the singing of sacred scriptures to my late Aunt Sheila also known as Sister Leo…I was always very fond of my Aunt Sheila but sad to say we did not get along very well when I was in Ireland due to my anger issues…I feel very much at peace these days now that I am getting the help I need to deal with my anger…My remedy is to dedicate the singing of sacred scriptures to my late Aunt Sheila…I did write the lamentations of the unborn a work I felt inspired to do to mourn the loss of so many innocent children who die due to abortion on demand and birth control…Once I finished the lamentations of the unborn I felt like a burden was lifted from me and since God knows all things I let it go…I deleted those posts…It took me three years to complete that work a work that is now shrouded in memory and returned to God…The reason I removed those posts was because no amount of writing would ever bring those children back to our world…God can and God will allow for reincarnation of those children who do return to earth at the appointed time known to God alone…We all have immortal souls and as such we are both human and divine…Something we would all do well to remember…It is something I forget from time to time something I am learning to remember more and that is my divine nature as well as my human nature…I hope you enjoy the work I have done so far in singing sacred scriptures…I experience joy when I do this and singing sacred scriptures is an expression of my love for God…